the best mistake

"come back"
i used to say that words since the day you've gone from my life.
"i miss you"
i used to say those words when all the flashbacks comes
but now, i don't even know what to say.
cause even i've wasted all of my tears on you, you will never come back.
i know because i cried.
and even if i beg you a thousand times you'll never come back.
i know because i tried.

do all those moments we've shared together is just a bullshit and all those sweet words you said is just a lie? cause baby, i trusted it all.
and even if this was the very last moment we'd see each other again.. i still have that feelings that's keeps me wishing on my 11:11 , my birthday candle wishlist or the wishing star.

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but as day by day pass by..
i always questioning myself .. 'why did you go? why did you leave me behind? where's all those promises we've made together? is it all my fault for letting you pass by? or i'm just too fool to believe you with those kind of bullshit?'

ahh.. it's just too complicated to say.
maybe.. just maybe if we could have another time, another place and another chance to start this all over again. it'd be so different..
but, do you want to know a secret?
even if on the first place we started all of this 'mistake' , and i know that it'd hurt me so much. i'd still do this anyway.
cause you are the best mistake i could ever have.
and you are the kind of mistake that i will never regret even just for a second.



---- and baby, if loving you was wrong, i don't wanna be right ----

growing up

there's a story.
we all know this story 'cause i bet you all have this kind of feeling.
the feeling of sorrow, pain, and mad at the same time.
hurt by our own feelings, for being too care, think that all the things we've done isn't good enough, feeling lonely, but most of all we all hurt by losing.
wishing we all could go back to our first place
and we're keep saying "i wish.." or "if.."

let's just go back to that day. a few years ago.
that years.. so much to remember.
when we used to sit side by side, laugh without any compulsion.
be who we wanna be and never force ourselves with those kind of shit.

we all used to run and fall.
we bleed and we cry.
we dream and we laugh.
we smile and we love.

but we're just too fool to realize that growing up isn't as sweet as it seems.
we're all once dreamed about growing up and never stopped wishing about it.
with no intention to wait we all rushed out of time and now, see what we've got?
we all get our own disappointment.
so naive? do you regret it? ask yourself.
because i do..